


Humanity Has Its Disadvantages

by HannaLorei



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Destiel - Freeform, M/M, Mild Smut, Season 9 Spoilers, human!Cas, slightly angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-10
Updated: 2014-05-10
Packaged: 2018-01-24 05:08:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1592726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HannaLorei/pseuds/HannaLorei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Slight AU, in that something happened while human!cas was at the bunker.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Humanity Has Its Disadvantages

**Author's Note:**

> Well I'm not entirely sure how this happened but it did and I am so sorry about the ending. It was supposed to be happy, but, well.

Dean brought Cas to the bunker. He knew he shouldn't, that Ezekiel didn't like it and he might leave Sam, but it was _Cas_ , for god's sake. He needed a place to stay and the least Dean could do was to let him stay in his home for a while.

  
It was pretty late but Dean had been busy with research all night. He was tired and he needed to go to bed, but first he wanted to talk to his friend. He wandered to the room they put Cas in. He knocked on Cas's door, not waiting for an answer before pushing it open. "Hey, Cas, I just want to talk- oh." He trailed off as he turned and saw Cas. He probably should've waited for his friend to invite him in, because he'd just walked out of the bathroom in only a towel wrapped around his waist.

  
Dean swallowed. "Sorry, this is a bad time... It can wait until tomorrow," he managed to stammer out.  
"Wait, Dean, why is it a bad time?" Cas asked, looking confused. Dean gestured at Cas. "Dude, you're not wearing pants."  
"I am comfortable in this body. It does not bother me," said Cas.  
"Well, it bothers me," snapped Dean.  
“But you're confident in your heterosexuality. Why would it bother you?"  
Dean fidgeted. "I don't know, man. It just does. You wanna talk, put on some boxers at least." Cas sighed and went back into the bathroom.

  
Cas closed the door behind him and Dean flopped down on the bed. He rubbed his face with his palms. This had gotten real awkward, real fast, and he wasn't sure how it had happened. But now Cas wasn't wearing pants and only separated from him by a towel and wow but it was a really good thing that he hadn't realized that sooner, because it was doing all kinds of things to him. Crap. He really should leave. Before Cas came back- he couldn't look him in the eye now, not without... unfortunate results.

  
What was he thinking? He couldn't be in here. He couldn't be doing this. Sammy would find out, and Dean had no idea how his brother would react to the fact that Dean was bi. Even he wasn't entirely sure how to feel about it. He himself had just realized a few years ago. He hadn't really been attracted to guys, except the occasional actor, until he'd met the angel who had pulled him out of hell and sacrificed all he'd believed in for him. How was Dean not supposed to fall for Cas? He'd saved him. Not just his life, either, but his soul. And... those eyes. And his hair, and he wasn't exactly the thin, pale guy Dean had imagined underneath all the layers. He'd just gotten a nice hard (no pun intended) look at that. And this train of thought wasn't exactly helping his current state.

  
"Damn it," Dean growled, sitting up. Time to leave. Things were becoming rather uncomfortable. Except at that moment, Cas chose to walk out of the bathroom. Now he was wearing pants, although he still was shirtless. He looked mildly uncomfortable, so Dean decided he'd better make it quick for both of their sakes. He cleared his throat.  
"Look, Cas, I really appreciate all you've done for us, but you can't stay for long," Dean muttered that last part. He hated himself for saying it, but he couldn't risk Ezekiel getting angry and deciding to leave. "It's... It's complicated, and I'm sorry, but you're gonna have to go after a few days." He risked looking up after he'd finished speaking, though he'd immediately regretted it. Those blue eyes- they were filled with hurt, and it stung. But still they were beautiful enough to make his problem more obvious, and Dean subtly shifted his hands so that they were covering his crotch.

He really hoped Cas wouldn't notice, and, although he stiffened slightly when he saw Dean fidgeting, he didn't seem to.  
"It's okay. I'm just putting you and your brother in danger by being here, anyways," mumbled Cas. He still looked hurt, but there was resignation in his voice."I'll just stay for another day or two. Don't worry about me." He forced a smile.  
"Great," Dean managed to squeeze out. The guilt and, if he was being honest, the arousal, was starting to tighten his throat. Yeah, he felt horrible for thinking like this right now, but Cas still hadn't put on a freaking shirt. Damn angel hadn't gotten all that social stuff down yet.

  
"Is that all you wanted to speak to me about?" Cas asked. "You look preoccupied."  
"What? Oh, no, that's about it," Dean said, confused. Was he really that easy to read? He was really going to have to work on that. He put his hands on his knees and pushed himself off Cas's bed. He almost lost his balance, though, because of the friction of his jeans rubbing against him as he stood up. _Son of a bitch_. How had he forgotten about that? He quickly glanced at Cas to see if he'd noticed. And judging from the startled stare he got in return, Cas had definitely noticed.

  
Shit.

  
"Um. I'll just leave now," Dean's mouth twisted into an awkward half-smile. He turned to leave, but Cas stepped in his way.  
"Dean. Wait."  
"No, Cas, I have to-" but Dean was cut off mid sentence by Cas stepping into his personal space. His very personal space. Dean sucked in a breath. Damn, but that felt _way_ too good.

  
Cas spoke suddenly, startling him. "Being human... It has its disadvantages. Such as the fact that it has gotten far more difficult to control certain urges."  
Dean forced himself to ask the question burning into his tongue. "Urges like-?" He didn't dare to even think about what the answer might be.  
"Urges like this," Cas responded and, not giving Dean any time to reply, he stood straighter and up a bit on his toes and kissed him.

  
For the first few seconds, all Dean could do was stand there, startled, fists clenched at his sides. But once he realized this is actually happening, he was much more interested in participating. He reached his arms around to Cas's neck and pulled him closer, growling possessively. He froze as he felt Cas against him, suddenly becoming aware that he'd been so distracted by his own "problem" that he hadn't realized- Cas had one of his own.

  
Cas noticed Dean's hesitation and broke the kiss, stepping back. "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it, I'm not used to-" but Dean didn't let him finish his sentence. This time, Dean was the one who started the kiss, grabbing Cas's hips and pulling him back towards him. This time, he was expecting the contact of what was definitely not just a thigh, and he moved his upper leg against it. This had the rather fortunate side effect of moving the fast-growing bump in Dean's pants against Cas's and they both tensed.

  
"This... I've never... Dean, I don't know how to do any of this. It's new, it's human." Cas gasped out.  
Dean smirked wickedly. "So what you're trying to say, Cas, is that you've never gotten off to a guy before?" He punctuated Cas's name with a thrust of his hips forwards, small but enough to make Cas groan with want, and shake his head minutely.  
"No. I've never experienced any sexual pleasure, not before that reaper-"  
"The one you banged."  
"And you stabbed. We've been through this, Dean."  
Dean sighed, distractedly rubbing his right thumb along Cas's hip bone. "Do you blame me? She tried to kill you. And, I've wanted to be your first practically since I met you. Then the stupid reaper turned up, and... So much for that."  
Now it was Cas's turn to smirk. "Want to know who I was thinking about the whole time? Especially during the best part?"  
Dean's eyes widened in shock. It was one thing to be making out and grinding against eachother, but it was a whole other thing for Cas to basically tell him that _he had orgasmed to him_. Dean's eyes narrowed again, lips curling into a half-smile.  
"Bed. Now," he stated, practically shoving Cas towards his temporary mattress. Cas was more than happy to follow Dean's lead, and pulled him down with him.

The next morning, Dean woke up feeling actually well-rested for the first time in what seemed like years. He turned over to see if Cas was awake, but frowned when he saw that the other side of the bed was empty. So much for some morning fun. Suddenly, Dean realized that if Cas wasn't in here, then he was probably out in the library or kitchen. Talking to Sam.

  
"No. Nonononono. Crap. No," Dean muttered out loud, rolling out of the bed and pulling on his wrinkled clothing that had been unceremoniously thrown on the floor hours ago. He grinned at the memories of these same clothes being taken off, but shook his head and reminded himself to focus. Sam couldn't find out, not yet. It didn't feel right to tell him now. He wasn't even sure how to classify him and Cas, not that he'd ever really worried about that sort of thing before, but still. He jogged out of Cas's room, listening carefully before turning the corner to his and Sam's hallway. He carefully opened the door to his room, making sure to keep absolutely quiet, and slipped inside. He then walked back out, making a point to slam the door shut behind him. He moved quickly through the bunker to the kitchen, faking a yawn as he came through the doorway.

"Morning, Sammy. Morning, Cas," he said, rubbing his eyes for good measure.  
"Morning, Dean," Sam muttered through a mouthful of toast, looking carefully through an old book. "Cas isn't here though. I haven't seen him all morning. Maybe he's still asleep."  
It was suddenly very hard for Dean to breathe. "I'll... Go and check in his room," he choked out, trying (and probably failing) to sound normal. Sam nodded distractedly, too absorbed in his research to notice anything wrong.

  
Dean sprinted back to his room, slamming the door and fumbling for his phone. He hit the 2 on speed dial and pressed the phone to his ear, rubbing at his face.

"Hello?"

Immediately Dean relaxed. He'd been worried- terrified- that Cas wouldn't pick up. "Cas! Where are you, man? Why'd you just disappear like that? You almost gave me a heart attack."

"Dean. You don't understand. I can't-"

"Can't what, Cas?" Dean interrupted. "After what we managed to do last night in the space of a few hours, I'd say that "can't" doesn't really apply to either of us."

Cas sighed into his phone. "You don't understand. Listen to me, Dean. You were right. I do have to leave. I'm only putting you and Sam in danger, and the longer I'm there with you the less I'm going to want to leave. Especially if there's more nights like the last one."

Dean flushed, remembering exactly what they'd managed to fit into just a few hours the night before.

"I'm leaving for now, Dean. Until this whole mess blows over. Until me just being around doesn't threaten your safety. Please don't look for me. Goodbye." _*click_ *

Dean dropped his phone on the bed. This was his fault. Like everything else. Now, he had nobody. Sam was burying himself in possible cases, and Kevin was translating the Angel tablet. Dean had lost his best friend, and he'd deserved it. He hadn't been strong enough to let his little brother go, not even to close the gates of hell, and now the one who'd saved Sam would make Dean pay dearly for it.

And the worst part was, Cas thought that Dean wanted him to leave.

**Author's Note:**

> This is sort of a WIP, it's my first fanfiction so I keep re-reading it and changing little things if I don't like them. If anyone notices anything you think I should probably change, some bad grammar or punctuation, or some piece of canon that I got wrong, please comment! I'd love to see it from other peoples' point of view. Or, feel free to pm me or ask on my tumblr (URL deans-fucking-eyes)


End file.
